Being seen, and who isn’t

Happy International Women's Day.

This morning's reflection comes from Alex M, our Training and Development Lead. Drawing on her own experience of being seen and supported as a young girl, Alex reflects on what happens when those conditions, time, curiosity, belief and relationship, are absent for others.

Across this week of Hidden, But Not Silent, we’ve heard how young women’s voices are often misunderstood, overlooked or misread by the systems around them. Alex’s piece brings us back to something fundamental: visibility is not passive, it’s a practice.

As a young girl, I moved through many places and spaces—schools, local estates. A space that stands out: my local Youth and Community centre. I was there almost every day after school. Looking back, I know exactly why. The youth workers and professionals around me didn’t just supervise me; they saw me. They made time to talk with me and listen. They invested in building a supportive relationship, and they invested in my development. Their belief in me helped me believe in myself.

But looking back, and through my work at Abianda, I know many young women and girls never received this. They were present in the same spaces, yet invisible. And when they were noticed, they were often met with punitive responses instead of care. Their behaviour was judged, but their experiences weren’t understood.

At Abianda, we see how girls affected by criminal exploitation are still denied the conditions that help them thrive: time, curiosity, relationship, and belief. Instead, systems often respond with surveillance, sanctions, or blame. Or not at all! Visibility is not passive. It’s an intentional practice. And when professionals don’t actively see these young women, invisibility and harm are repeated.

So today, I’m asking you to pause and reflect:

How are you seeing the young women and girls you work with?

What needs to shift in your practice to ensure you’re not contributing to their invisibility?

Being seen is not a privilege.  It’s safeguarding.  It’s care.

And it’s a responsibility we all share! 

Alex M, Training and Development Lead